Making changes in national law to protect victim/survivors of domestic violence!


Late at night...dear House

Reblogged from Poetic Bluebonnet:

The tv murmurs with redundant sounds,

but nothing else be it abounds.

The world around me seem to sleep

yet I know there is another world which

works while our sleep is deep.

Know this to be true as I have worked it myself

just like Santa’s best elf.

The phone would ring with a new crisis

for this advocate to have no biases…

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This is a subject matter weighing heavily upon my mind, especially in light of certain events in the House. It's disappointing that they would choose politics over what would be right for the victim.

Additional VAWA Reauthorization Materials

Reblogged from Turtle Talk:

Here is the Administration’s policy statement on the VAWA reauthorization, largely opposition to the House version.

And here is the House Judiciary Committee Report on the H.R. 4970, VAWA Reauthorization (HRPT-112-HR4970cj).  According to the Report, “The justification for why these provisions are necessary is also questionable. Proponents of these provisions tout unverifiable statistics about the rate of non-Indian violence against Indian women on Indian land…”

Thanks! Keep up the good work and keep us informed! I have some appointments this morning, but will be back online this afternoon.

VAWA Passes Senate without Republican Changes

Reblogged from Turtle Talk:


Additional coverage: Indian Country Today Washington Post NY Times

Statement of Sen. Akaka Press Release from NCAI

A personal favorite–Fem 2.0 “After all my reading I’m still loss as to why Republicans do not trust tribal courts.”

Why cannot the VAWA be passed without the Republican changes in the House??? It's going to be a busy, busy day today!! :))

VAWA's Tribal Provisions Better Protect Native Women Locally

Reblogged from Turtle Talk:

On May 8th, the House Judiciary Committee marked up and passed H.R. 4970, a stripped-down Violence Against Women Reauthorization Act (VAWA) that excludes a number of key provisions found in the Senate bill, including those bearing on the safety of Native women and communities. Get informed! Visit for more information on how to get involved.

The full House of Representatives is expected to vote on its VAWA reauthorization bill soon — as early as mid week.

A video speaker about this urgent issue! Hopefully, the stripped down version doesn't pass. We need the protections that were originally written into the VAWA.

VAWA Reauthorization Bill to be Considered by Rules Committee Today at 5PM

Reblogged from Turtle Talk:

Here is the House Bill:


H.R. 4970, the VAWA reauthorization bill will be considered by the Rules Committee today at 5pm.  The hearing can be viewed at:

Instead of the three tribal provisions in S. 1925 that would:

  • Provide Indian tribes criminal jurisdiction over domestic violence, dating violence, and violations of protective orders that occur on Indian lands;

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This is great.... but have they changed the wordings back to better protect the victims and survivors? There's a lot of work to get done before 5. If you haven't called and talked to your representatives yet, you should do so this morning!! Love that the link to follow the hearing is included in this blog! :)

"We women of one country will be too tender of those of another to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs." Mother's Day as Resistance

Reblogged from Women's Space:

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by Cheryl Lindsey Seelhoff, written Mother’s Day, 2006

The women responsible for the holiday we know as Mother’s Day did not celebrate the day as it is celebrated in the United States. The day as they envisioned and conceived it had nothing to do with telephone calls from children, flowers, candy, or dinners out. It had nothing to do with the mothers and grandmothers with the most children and grandchildren being recognized with carnations and ribbons during church meetings.

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That is certainly an interesting point of view. Actually, I think I might have heard something to the effect before, but never really had heard, as Paul Harvey would say, "the rest of the story!"

Mother: A Lifetime of Scarifice

Reblogged from Notes to My Daughter:

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Your life of sacrifice enabled me to live.  

February 2, 1923 – September 12, 2011

I know a woman, who suffered unspeakable brutality,

in a time when women were but chattel,

at the hands of one who took an oath before God to love, protect and cherish her.

I know a woman, who suffered in silence,

 the indignities caused by a philandering husband…

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Definitely, powerfully written. Thank you for sharing!

From single mom to single

Reblogged from Deliberate Donkey:

first draft, Final Judgement of Dissolution of Marriage, Division 49, 7th Judicial Circuit Court, Kim C. Hammond Justice Center in Bunnell, Fla., prepared by C. Michael Barnette, Esq., with The Law Office of C. Michael Barnette, Daytona Beach, Fla.

Judge Dennis Craig ordered, “The mother shall transfer the minor children to the father on or about May 12, 2012, which is one week after the father finishes his attendance at Embry Riddle Aeronautical University this term.” (page 13, …

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Wow! I remember the day that I had to finally exchange my daughter with her father. The Courts (back in 89-91) had been a little more protective back then; or may be I was in a conservative County with a great Judge who actually cared; and many in those Courts in that County had already seen me come to his court hearings where he was indicted for the domestic violence he had done to me. Whatever the case, I appreciated the Judge allowing him only to visit from 12noon to 6pm on Saturday and 12noon to 6pm on Sunday, alternating with Wednesday in the following week from 4-6pm. Being that we were about 20-30 miles away, he chose not to come out too often until she got older (he didn't know what to do with a toddler???). lol.... I do remember the anxieties and worries, when he finally did come out to get her.... was she going to be safe? was there someone else going to be with him so that my daughter could be protected and defended if he did let loose? Mine too had drank a lot, up until a year that I finally left for good. I worried about him slipping and drinking again. Was he going to be able to take care of her. At least, with her being between 4-5 years old when he finally did visit her, she could talk, scream, run to a neighbor's house and get help if need be -- although I hoped and prayed that that day would never exist. What many folks don't realize when they think about a woman leaving the husband with the child(ren) is that the woman oftentimes still has to deal with the "donkey" even if they are living in separate homes. Because the courts see it that both parents are entitled to continue being active parents to the child(ren), however, I never could understand how in the world could they allow the child(ren) to be around a parent who had caused harm on another human being and (2) how could they expect that the abusive parent wouldn't continue to do harm to the one that left (even without the physical abuse, but continuing the manipulation and control through emotional abuse. My daughter is now almost 25 years old and is her own person and we didn't see her father for 7 years because he signed away termination of parental rights when she was 5 years old (but that is a whole 'nother story). I don't have to see him at all any more though now... and feel much better and safer from him. I hope and pray that you don't have the struggles that I have encountered and truly hope that you find happiness and freedom from not having to be with him and continue living with him. Hopefully, there will be some solace that you will discover along your journey of healing. Best of luck and many hugs and prayers.

The Aunt of four Queensland sisters in hiding to avoid deportation to Italy

Reblogged from markdarin:

A Sunshine Coast mother is distraught over a Family Court ruling ordering the deportation of her four daughters to Italy. Click to hear Mark and Caroline speak with the girls’ Aunt after the desicion to go into hiding.

This is really sad to know that the Family Courts in Australia can be just as disconcerting as the Family Courts in the United States. I would love to hear more about this particular case, wouldn't you? I thought the Hague Convention is more universal. Were they taken from their original home in Italy? Can you please share more about this story with us? The voices are compelling and the fright is certainly felt. I'd hate to hear that they are forced to live a life in hiding just because the Family Courts weren't in alignment to keep them there where they seem to be doing well and feel to be in a more comfortable environment; however, it would be very interesting to learn more about all the circumstances.

Current project : Art Therapy group for children affected by domestic violence

Reblogged from haringeyarttherapy:

I am currently setting up an Art Therapy group in a refuge for children affected by domestic violence. I will facilitate the group with a volunteer Art Therapist.

There was recently an interesting article about this type of group in the last  Inscape:International Journal of Art Therapy. Mills, E.& Kellington, S.(2012). Using group art therapy to address the shame and silencing surrounding children’s experiences of witnessing domestic violence.

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Oh, thank you for sharing this resource. I've always been strongly a proponent for incorporating art therapy as a part of the recovery process. There is much to be said for that. I'm certainly interested in learning more in way of helping children through the art therapy.

Yes, it's possible.

Reblogged from OUT OF THE FOG NOW:

Just the other night I was asked,

“If you’re married, how can it be rape?”

No matter how many times I have been asked this question in the past,it still amazes me that so many people continue to ask it.

The true understanding of rape, even sexual assault, comes from recognizing and comprehending the difference between an act that is sexual in nature and, an act to gain and/or maintain power and control over a person.

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Exactly! Rape is rape is rape -- no matter if it is a stranger, someone that they date, or they are married to. We need to make sure that ALL victims of rape are truly protected and offered safety and recovery. Absolutely, too -- no one should ever "act to gain and/or maintain power and control over a person".

Victims Of St. Anthony Murder-Suicide Identified

Reblogged from CBS Minnesota:

ST. ANTHONY, Minn. (WCCO) — St. Anthony Police say a school bus driver, beloved by her students, was the victim of murder suicide Monday night.

Police were called around 8:30 p.m. to a duplex on the 3200 block of 39th Avenue NE after reports of shots fired.

Officers said a 52-year-old man shot both his 46-year-old wife and her 25-year-old son before turning the gun on himself.

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How horrible and sad that there is yet another homicide-suicide. It's good that they have all been identified; however, I just wish that it never crossed over to that point of no return. More awareness and protection is needed for our victims of domestic violence.

Call Your Representative Today to Protect VAWA!

Reblogged from Point4CounterPoint:

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Call Your Representative Today to Protect VAWA!

Take Action!

Your representative needs to hear from you!  

As early as tomorrow, the House of Representatives could vote on a bill that would undermine many critical Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) programs and fail to help prevent violence on campus. We need your voice, as do the tens of thousands of victims of…

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We want to see that the VAWA eventually passes but not the way that it has been re-written that scales down the protection of the victims and survivors. Thank you.

A Common Story

Reblogged from Scribbles on Liberty:

This story is a compilation from many of the VAWA cases I’ve worked on in the last four years. All names have been changed, but the content couldn’t be more true.

Their’s was a love story. A drama.

David and Veronica met through close friends. He brought flowers to their first date. She smiled brightly each time he opened the door.

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How timely is this???? Thank you for sharing those stories involving VAWA circumstances.

I'll Walk With You

Reblogged from myraysoflight:

I’ll Walk With You

The storm it is brewing

The war has been waged

We have altered a life

A child filled with rage

Where we might think it isn’t

A communicable disorder

We have started a chain

Can not be afforded

Outside looking inward

Logic is lost for a while

Why would an abused adult

Then abuse another child…

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Wow! That's beautifully written. Thank you for sharing that. (((HUGS))))

A Website for Non-Custodial Mothers

Reblogged from letmeprotectmychild:

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Women with Broken Heart (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If you are reading this than you are in the midst of a ‘high-conflict contested custody’ battle. Chances are you have experienced some form of maltreatment, abuse or domestic violence in the relationship with your ex. Whatever the reason is for your divorce, if you have entered into the arena of family law court you might be finding yourself losing the very thing that gives your life meaning…your children.

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The courts are lop-sided and fickle and often believe the manipulations of the abuser (who ever that may be). It's hard for the parent who has fallen victim to the abuser to stand up and have a voice in the courts when abusers can be quite manipulative. More the reason that the laws need to be changed.

yes. i concur.

Reblogged from security is for cadavers:

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Good for you, Senator Bernie Sanders!! We need hundreds upon hundreds of people who think just like you!! :))

Take Back the Night - A Domestic Abuse Survivor's Inspirational Story

Reblogged from familyresourcesblog:

Our annual Take Back the Night event was held recently at Schwiebert Park on the banks of the Mississippi River in Rock Island. The purpose is to raise awareness that sexual abuse and other interpersonal violence is a crime. We want everyone to know that if they have been victimized, Family Resources is here to help you recover your life.

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These events help to spread awareness of the domestic violence and sexual assault issues at hand. The number of folks that turn up for these events demonstrate how important it is to keep the Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault programs going that help these people restore their lives so that they can cope and move forward in their livest.

Yeardley Love's Mother Wants Stronger Domestic Violence Laws

Reblogged from CBS Baltimore:

WASHINGTON (WJZ) — Murdered University of Virginia student Yeardley Love’s mother speaks out for the first time since Love’s boyfriend was convicted in her death. Sharon Love broke her silence Wednesday in a push for laws to protect women from domestic violence.

Vic Carter has more.

A heartbroken Baltimore mother took the national stage in Washington, opening up about the domestic abuse that took her child’s life.

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The last statement on this posting indicated that "Vice President Biden says there has been progress in the 18 years since the law passed, with domestic violence down 60 percent, but Yeardley’s death is a reminder that there’s more work to be done." Nothing can be truer!!

RealTalk - Amendment One Backyard Chat

Reblogged from The Vine Events:

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We Are Campaign Discussion Facilitators

Amendment One (as it will appear on the North Carolina’s ballot): “Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State.”

North Carolina’s Amendment One will affect aspects other than marriage, said campaign leaders on Sunday, April 29,  during The Vine Event Planning’s  ”RealTalk – Amendment One Backyard Chat.”

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With President Obama pointing out his views, and Mitt Romney defining his stance, (and while each State has been struggling on a State by State impact), how do you see where the viewpoint truly lies with us as a Nation? Will we ever see a federal law passed on this issue???

Senate Reauthorizes Violence Against Women Act (VAWA)

Reblogged from In The News...:

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This week, the US Senate voted overwhelmingly to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA). Here is how the VAWA reauthorization vote went in the US Senate: sixty-eight (68) in favor, thirty-one (31) against.  Each of the thirty-one (31) senators who voted against it were Republican men. It should be noted that these thirty-one (31) men are the only senators to ever cast a vote against reauthorizing the Violence Against Women Act.

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What is really disturbing is that it was fought so strongly for the humanity aspect -- including non-citizens with the VAWA bill, etc. treating all victims as a human being. If the same folks were in a different country, wouldn't they like to know that they would be protected as a victim as well??? Pure hogwash and insanity to think otherwise.

Restitution Toolkit | Texas District & County Attorneys Association

Restitution toolkit

The National Center for Victims of Crime (NCVC) has e-published the final two sections of its Restitution Toolkit (featured in a fall 2011 MMM). You can now download the complete Toolkit at ncvc/main.aspx?dbID=DB_MakingRestitutionReal171. I can’t tell you how many times, when I worked at the Attorney General’s Office, I answered a desperate call from crime victims trying to find out if they had been awarded restitution. Somehow the victim had gotten all the way through sentencing without hearing from the probation office or prosecutor that restitution had been ordered. NCVC has samples of brochures for victims about restitution that are especially useful and can be adapted for your office: main.aspx?dbID=DB_ToolkitResources412#SelfHelp.

via Crime Victims’ Rights Week 2012 | Texas District & County Attorneys Association.

via Restitution Toolkit | Texas District & County Attorneys Association.

Crossing Oceans

Crossing Oceans

Might be a great motto for our project… ;)

~ Kat


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